Culture shock

I've been feeling a bit blue since getting back from India. I think it's a mixture of culture shock and Chloe and I having a sick bug since we returned. One thing I really enjoyed about India was the fact that everyone is so open and welcoming. For example, mum and dad's neighbour invited Chloe to her child's birthday party even though they didn't know her! Or when mum and dad's maid invited us to her metal shack in the slum to have crisps and bottles of Coke.

The slum was much as I imagined; there was lots of rubbish, flies everywhere, illegal wires buzzing over our heads and children playing in the dirt. Even so, I did find myself a little jealous of the culture of sharing life together in the slum. It seemed like everyone looked out for each other and everyone knew each other. They all helped to look after the children and cooked together. People came round to see us when they knew that we were visiting and just let themselves in to the shack. It was very much a 'sharing' community.

I can't help but feel a little bit sad when I think about my first day back when we arrived in England. J had to work and I was at home all day with a child who was being sick and had diarrhoea, I was really quite poorly myself and poor Livia was bouncing off the walls with boredom. It was a really hard day and I felt very lonely (sorry getting a bit honest here). I do realise I could've sent out an SOS message but it's really hard when everyone is so busy and it's difficult to know who to ask. I feel like if we lived in a culture for the neighbours bustled in and out, took the children off you for awhile, made meals - that we would have a greater sense of community. (I should add here that I did have help with Livia from my mother in law the following day).

By the way I am not having a go at other people for not caring; they didn't know! And I am very guilty of getting on with 'my life' in isolation. I'm not invasive enough in my friendships and I give up on friendships far too easily. I need to learn to persevere when things are hard and be there for people at their time of need. Sometimes it's hard to know how to do that when it's so counter-cultural. I love the verses in Acts 2 about the disciples having 'all things in common'. I would love that to be more true in my life and in the church in general.

Please help me Jesus to be more of a good friend and sister to the people in my life. Help me to be more generous and more outward-looking. Thank you that you are changing me bit by bit and I am sorry when I dig my heels in. Amen.

Living

At the moment I am visiting India with Chloe, staying with my parents and spending a couple of days in Jaipur. It's been an amazing trip and I am so glad Chloe has had this opportunity.

I wanted to write a post because I met a baby boy today and he really moved me and I feel I can't just forget about him. We were walking in a shopping street in Jaipur, past all the sellers trying to persuade us into their shops. It was very busy with not much room on the pavement and we had to keep dodging piles of rubbish or suspicious puddles. It wasn't the nicest area with motorbikes, cars and auto-rickshaws blaring their horns and narrowly missing us. Having a child with me, it was easy to get caught up in trying to keep her away from danger and not really thinking about the people who actually lived there.

A woman was standing off the pavement. I think she had probably been chased away from the shops by the sellers. She was gesturing to us for money and was holding a baby. It's hard to work out his age because he was obviously malnourished but probably no more than 7 months. He was half naked, I guess because she couldn't afford nappies, with a swollen tummy and was very lethargic, hanging off his morher's arm. He was the most beautiful little boy and my heart hurts thinking about what his chances are. 

I gave the mother some money, probably not the right thing to do but what else? It's horrible when you know that nothing you can do right there and then will change their situation. As we left I managed to get a smile out of the mum and touched his little cheek, he looked up at me. It's hard not to make this sound really cheesy but that look will stay with me.

I feel so silly for all the tiny, insignificant things I worry about, especially about the girls. Like what they wear and whether they get all their spellings right. I am so thankful to live a life where I don't have to worry daily about their survival. We have so much. 

Please God look after that little boy. I pray he grows up healthy and strong and manages to get to a position where life isn't so tough. Thank you for all the lessons Chloe is learning too.