Playing together

I think a challenging aspect of parenting which seems to only get more difficult, is finding quality time to spend with children. I don't mean going exciting places together (soft play, swimming, days out) but just playing together at home. Chloe is constantly asking me 'Will you play with me?' I also am very aware that I haven't been as good at sitting down with Livia, as I was when Chloe was that age.

It is true that life has changed and a lot of the time, I just can't. There's washing, meals, shopping, life admin and errands to run. Now I am working 3 days a week, most of those jobs are packed into the other 2 days of the working week. I am also tired and sometimes need a sit down! I can reason that it's good for the girls to get used to playing by themselves.

But if I get into a pattern of not sitting and playing something they have chosen to play (even it involves crawling around the floor as a dog), I really notice the change in our relationship. Like it or not, I give out the message that I'm not interested in them. Our relationship becomes a series of instructions and a few questions: what did you do at school? Did you play with anyone new? Did you like your lunch? I'm very unlikely to get a response. 

Behaviour starts to deteriorate as the girls try other ways at getting my attention. Often when Chloe gets into whiny, stroppy mode, I am tempted to give her a time out in her room to calm down. I am starting to realise that this is not the right response to a little girl who is simply craving some quality time with mummy.

When I do make time for the girls, strange things happen, like Chloe suddenly telling me all about a game she played in the playground or a new song she's learnt ('please and thank you, we must say!'). I get to see into her mind a little more. I also learn things about Livia I didn't know, such as the fact that she can copy her sister's ballet moves or that she really enjoys playing mums and babies.

These times are so precious and fun, and yet I still say, 'mummy's busy', so often when Chloe asks to play. I needed to write this down so that I am reminded more that I must make playing together a priority. It makes life so much easier and our family so much happier.