Wobbles

A funny thing happened yesterday. I was scrolling through Facebook and one of my friends had 'liked' a poem about starting school. It was one of those very soppy, emotional poems that seem to be so popular on Facebook (not normally something I would bother with!). But because it was to do with school, I thought I'd have a read. Halfway through and I had tears streaming down my face! J was completely bemused (and found it a little funny!) when I had to have a cuddle at the end, full on crying at this point!

I have been fairly laid back about Chloe starting school. I'm sure that's probably come across in the blog. I'm not naturally a 'clingy' mum. I'm quite happy to put my trust in others to look after my girls and believe it's good to have time apart sometimes. I also love education and can't wait to see how Chloe explores her potential and grows through school. However this poem made me think about things which I hadn't dwelt on before. It was written addressed to the teacher and asked questions like: who will cuddle her when she's sad? Who will help her when she can't cut up her food? Who will patiently explain when she doesn't understand? Who will listen to her when someone has been mean? (As a side note, this really challenged me as a teacher too. Especially as we have so many boarders who have no parents around).

It really struck me that Chloe is going to have to be a lot more independent. She won't have me there to keep her company and watch out for her all day. There are going to be another 29 children all in the same position as her and it will be impossible for her teacher/teaching assistants to give her the same attention I have been able to give her. The thought of her feeling upset or confused and not being there to help is a really sad one!

Anyway, that was last night. Since then we've had our home visit with her teacher and a teaching assistant. I did mention a few of these worries and her teacher was so reassuring. They were both lovely and I fully trust them to care for Chloe. Although it's hard to let go a little sometimes, I know that Chloe will learn good lessons through sorting out her own problems sometimes or needing to wait for help. I cannot and should not protect her from these things forever.

Most importantly I know that God is going with her into school. I'm going to make sure we pray together before her first session tomorrow. I feel reassured that Chloe has a strong belief in God protecting her.

Looking forward to tomorrow, eek!

(Photo shows the cakes Chloe made for her teachers for the home visit!)